Hi, it's Julie O'Hara here. I've been getting a lot of emails from uneasy gals who fear their men are straying, and Lee has turned this post over to me. So, let's get right to the heart of it: Is your guy hugging you, but thinking of someone else?
In more innocent days, a young girl might pick a daisy and count the petals, one by one: "He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me..." It's not so easy in the prime of our lives, is it?
Believe me, if you peek at his messages, follow him in your car or accuse him, you'll blow it. So, if you love this guy and want to preserve your relationship, listen carefully. First, take your blinders off. We tend to see people as we want them to be, and we block out things that don't match our image.
Less touching is the most significant clue that something is amiss...
How does he hug you? Does he lean over, his lower body not touching you? Does he pat your shoulder? He may be saddened about his waning feelings and unconsciously trying to reassure you. Head-to-head contact is especially loving and spontaneous. Does he still do that? In public, is his body angled toward you, especially his feet? Public touching is important, too. A light touch or squeeze in the presence of others says, this is my lover.
Even if all the above are missing in your relationship, don't assume that your guy is cheating and it's too late! Sometimes love wanes and a man starts looking around, but some simple body language adjustments can put the sizzle right back.
The key is mirroring. Put two people together, if one smiles, the other will smile back. If one crosses their arms, the other will soon do the same. Yawning, itching, leg crossing, you name it, if the behavior is prolonged, we're programmed to mimic it. Unfortunately, when a lover is distant, that unconsciously gets copied, too, and the distance grows.
So, use this body language fact to your advantage. Gradually increase the time you gaze into your man's eyes and touch him. And here's the most important tip: Prolong kissing him, at least every morning and every night.
Sounds simple, but it works!
Julie
In more innocent days, a young girl might pick a daisy and count the petals, one by one: "He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me..." It's not so easy in the prime of our lives, is it?
Believe me, if you peek at his messages, follow him in your car or accuse him, you'll blow it. So, if you love this guy and want to preserve your relationship, listen carefully. First, take your blinders off. We tend to see people as we want them to be, and we block out things that don't match our image.
Less touching is the most significant clue that something is amiss...
How does he hug you? Does he lean over, his lower body not touching you? Does he pat your shoulder? He may be saddened about his waning feelings and unconsciously trying to reassure you. Head-to-head contact is especially loving and spontaneous. Does he still do that? In public, is his body angled toward you, especially his feet? Public touching is important, too. A light touch or squeeze in the presence of others says, this is my lover.
Even if all the above are missing in your relationship, don't assume that your guy is cheating and it's too late! Sometimes love wanes and a man starts looking around, but some simple body language adjustments can put the sizzle right back.
The key is mirroring. Put two people together, if one smiles, the other will smile back. If one crosses their arms, the other will soon do the same. Yawning, itching, leg crossing, you name it, if the behavior is prolonged, we're programmed to mimic it. Unfortunately, when a lover is distant, that unconsciously gets copied, too, and the distance grows.
So, use this body language fact to your advantage. Gradually increase the time you gaze into your man's eyes and touch him. And here's the most important tip: Prolong kissing him, at least every morning and every night.
Sounds simple, but it works!
Julie
RSS Feed